Broken internal
I talked to a doctor about the nightmares, sleepless nights, and social anxiety I've been experiencing of late. He believes I'm experiencing a form of PTSD.
Fantastic.
Fantastic.
Labels: blah, disturbing, honesty
posted by Moe at 23:01
8 Comments:
Love the nightmares. The stranger the better. Hate the sleepless nights. Xanax and Ambien seem to help, though. Haven't been told I'm PTSD, but it wouldn't be too much of a stretch I guess.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and hope you fare well. After watching two of my brothers experience it (Mike/Katrina); (Steve/Iraq), I know it's a very difficult thing to go through.
I also see how it's taken a toll of Steve's Marine brothers that he served with.
Please keep seeing the doc and I'll be praying you get the help you need.
Problem > diagnosis > treatment > cure. Could be worse. You're a human doing a job that requires the mental strength of a mythical being. Any cop who really thinks he's that tough, is either kidding himself or working a cushy desk job. Advice from a veteran of a similar war: get comfortable with the reality of it, then solve the problem. It doesn't go away if you ignore it. As I said, it could be worse - what if there was no treatment? Good luck.
You mean that stuff isn't normal? Hell I've experienced social anxiety for quite some time now. I'm supposed to meet up with some old college buddies I haven't seen in over a decade.
I should be excited about it but I actually feel pretty anxious. I dread all the stupid questions about being a cop.
What's it like? Have you ever shot anyone? What's the worst thing you have ever seen? Why do you guys write so many tickets? What's the deal with doughnuts? I got pulled over once...
I often feel I live in a different world than most people.
Oh that sounds soooo familiar! Go find an EMDR specialist near you. It was developed for vets dealing with severe PTSD and they are finding it works on everyone with trauma. It takes a few minutes per session and I'm not kidding when I tell you, you can feel the emotion and all the issues disappear. The memory remains with no emotional component to it. It's amazing. There's an article on salon.com about EMDR being used for survivors of 9-11 in NY. It works with LE too. We may not suffer the intense and immediate trauma combat vets get but years of all the garbage we take in at work does take a toll.
http://www.emdr.com/
Stand strong, brother. 70% of my Force has some level of PTSD or other operational stress injury. Get a good psychologist and you will get through.
Asking for help was the hardest thing so far for me, and it looks like you're already there. You will make it.
Moe:
Sorry to hear that, but I think this is indicative of a LOT more people than just those that serve in the military OR law-enforcement.
Firefighters are suffering from this, and I know I'm even showing signs of PTSD.
(And all I do is live in the ghettohood)
A friend uptown is also a candidate because of the way his neighborhood has declined and that molotov that was tossed at his house a few years ago.
Add to that child molesters and I'd wager that regular, caring parents are showing slight signs of PTSD these days.
It's almost as though it's been engineered to permeate any aspect to a concerned person's life.
This is a cumulative situation.
The severity WILL differ from person to person, just as the treatments will.
Stay Strong...you've got plenty of folks in your corner.
And stay safe out there.
Hang in there my brother. I've tried the bottle and that doesn't work. I hope you find better alternatives.
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